I recently went back to work full time and to say it’s been nothing short of a challenge is a huge understatement.
Trying to coordinate everyone’s schedules and trying to make the impact of this decision minimal on the family, is proving very difficult, but honestly, I am loving it!
I think in a couple of weeks, we will have settled into our new routine and will have had time to adapt, but until then it’s all about trial and error.
The life of a “working mum” (all Mums are ‘working’, whether that involves work inside the home or out, but for the purpose of this post “Working Mum”is the terminology I will be using) is a day to day struggle.
Most of the time we are the ones who are still responsible for getting the kids up and dressed in the morning, getting breakfast underway and getting them off to school on time.
In the meantime we are also trying to organise ourselves for our working day too. It’s a huge juggle and struggle each morning, especially those mornings when you forget Band Practice….ooops…..
Up until now we have also been the ones left feeling the ultimate sense of guilt.
We feel guilty for having to leave our children each day in the care of others. We perhaps feel guilty that we are not devoting all out time and energy to our employers, when our families ask so much of us also.
But apparently there is a silver lining for the “working mother”.
Are “Stay At Home Mums” actually doing their child a disservice by staying at home with their children each and every day? Are the daughters of “Working Mothers” better prepared for life, than those that have a parent home with them full time?
Now before all the “Stay At a Home Mums” jump down my throat, kicking and screaming, I am not the one that came up with these latest statistics.
Recently studies have shown that daughters who have both parents working, may indeed be better prepared for life than those that have a full time parent at home.
Latest research has indicated that daughters who have working parents:-
- Are more motivated by having a working mother and therefore aspire to be just like her.
- Are more likely to have university degree.
- A working mother has a positive effect on their daughters academic achievements and results.
- Apparently, sons of a working mother are more likely to contribute to the household chores and be at home with duties considered to be more of a “feminine” nature…… *sigh*…this can only benefit their daughters in the long run….right?
Some things I have noticed since going back to work, have been how much of a luxury lifestyle my girls have actually had up until now.
They basically have not had to lift a finger!
Have I been doing them the ultimate disservice by staying at home and doing everything for them?
I have been the “Live in Maid” for far too long!
My first week of full time work saw me come home to a house of chaos. A house that looked like it had had a category 5 cyclone tear through it, spit it out and then come back for more!
It never occurred to my girls that perhaps they should help clean up when they got home from school. Maybe unpack and pack the dishwasher, give the floor a quick vacuum, put on a load of washing perhaps.
They never thought about it, because it had never been asked of them before….my huge mistake.
One of the lovely ladies I worked with mentioned that her 17 year old daughters cooks dinner each night. Apparently she loves to cook and is exceptional at it….my 17 year old doesn’t even know how to boil water!
So this week it has been a crash course on how to operate the dishwasher and vacuum cleaner and what chores need to be done each and every day to keep a household ticking.
The ultimate pride for me yesterday was to find that Miss 17 had coordinated the other 3 girls and they had been working like trojans.
Each one was allocated a job to do.
With the 4 of them pitching and each taking responsibility for a corner of the house, everything was organised and tidy when I came home and apparently it all had only taken 1/2 and hour of their time in the afternoon!
My fingers remain crossed that the novelty doesn’t wear off too soon and this miraculous feat remains constant. I was so proud of them!
I think along with the added responsibility, there has also been a new understanding and appreciation for what “Mum and Dad” actually do for them each and every day.
Just how do those clothes get washed?
How does dinner get cooked each night?
How is it that we do not live in filth and grime every day?
These things do not “just” happen….Someone (namely Mum and Dad) has actually been doing all these jobs for the family each and every day, completely oblivious to those around them.
Now it’s their turn to appreciate all that we do and to learn that one day they too will be responsible, hopefully with an equally supportive partner, to the efficient running of a home and can have a satisfying career to boot.
Isn’t that the ultimate dream of every girl “to have it all”?
Sometimes we just need to admit that we need a little assistance to achieve that.