Is Your Daughter A Bitch?
The word “Bitch” has all sorts of derogatory connotations attached to it.
It is often used as an insult and yes I admit the word flies through the walls of my house once my girls get going with World War 3.
But have we been using this word in the wrong context? Should girls who are called “b*tchy”, in fact just be slightly proud of being just this?
It’s not often the quite, shy and retiring girls that are pointed out as being the “b*tch”.
The “b*tch” is often the confident, self assured, outgoing girls, who know what they want out of life and are prepared to do anything to succeed and don’t care what they have to do to get there.
Many women I have worked for in the workforce in high ranking positions have often been called “b*tches” behind their backs. But at the end of the day these are the women who are making strides in their careers, earning the big bucks and tackling the boys at their own game.
So is actually being a “b*tch” a good thing? How can we encourage our girls to be strong and confident in their own lives and to indeed have that “spark”!
Don’t let your daughter become a “doormat“
She can still be polite, while being assertive to get her point across. If someone pushes in front of her in line, does she ignore the behaviour or does she tell the offending person to “please move” and wait in turn like everyone else? Encourage her to stand her ground.
If your daughter is being bullied, does she stand up for herself and report the offending behaviour?
Encourage her to stand up for herself and for others, to be strong and to realise what behaviour is acceptable and what isn’t.
If she takes something special to school for lunch and doesn’t want to share, then that’s ok too. Sometimes we just don’t want to share and she shouldn’t feel guilty for feeling that way, it’s ok to say no sometimes.
Don’t let her feel scared to offer an opinion
Not everyone agrees and not everyone has the same opinion on varying matters. That is just human nature.
The old saying “everyone is entitled to an opinion” is indeed very true. Some just know how to voice theirs better than others.
Encourage your daughter to make her voice heard, but also encourage her to listen to the opinions of others.
Also teach her to recognise when to speak up and when silence is the best course of action.
Encourage her to be a leader not a follower
A lot of female leaders are often referred to as b*itches.
Look at Julia Gillard, look at Julie Bishop and look at Hillary Clinton.
All these powerful women have had the b*tch term thrown at them at one time or another. Why are successful and powerful women often referred to in this way?
Is it because the old image of the meek and milld woman is still thought of as ideal?
Be quiet, don’t rock the boat, be polite…be a “good girl”, these are things that girls are told all the time.
I say hell no!!
Give her lots of responsibility
Make sure she has chores to do around the house, give her lots of responsibility. Make sure she is doing things for herself and is developing a sense of independence. It makes your life easier in the long run too!
Teach her to accept herself just the way she is
Some girls are outgoing, some are shy and reserved.
Teach her to embrace her personality and both of you to accept who she is. We are not all the same and we shouldn’t expect others to think that we are.
Do not compare her to her siblings. She will excel in areas where her siblings may not. Encourage that and be proud, where ever her interests may lie.
At this stage I have an academic, a sportsperson, a musician and singer and well one that is still deciding….. and that’s OK.
Encourage that inner “fire”!
Encourage her to push through “that glass ceiling”
My girls hear this all the time.
They go to an all girls high school and “pushing through the glass ceiling” is practically their daily motto.
This is a great school who strives to encourage girls to reach for their potential, no matter where their interests lie.
Being born male or female should have no bearing on what future they may decide for themselves. Help her make her own choices based on desire and ambition, not her gender.
I think the term b*tch these days is often be misinterpreted.
Girls that are being referred to as being the b*tch are probably anything but, they are just self assured, confident, know what they want out of life and are determined to do anything to get it.
It’s how they go about it that makes all the difference.
Maybe we should be referring to girls as “nasty” and “mean” to describe behaviour from girls that is really unacceptable not the word b*tch.
On another note my labrador is a b*tch and she is really cuddly…..